Getting Kicked Out..?

This past Wednesday I was training with my Personal Trainer on the big mat with three other student-teacher pairs. He was teaching me Kung Fu. I was already pretty warmed up after the Group and Kicking classes and now I had to do forms training. Before opening up, the Trrainer said he would look up my website again - I showed it to him on the previous lesson. We were doing Crossing Talon and Eagle Claw and Bear-hug Free. The forms involved breaking the attackers arm, wrist-locking him and then following up with strikes of elbow to the temple and elbow to the spinal cord. Although the Trainer was obviously ready to put the mitt where my elbow went, once or twice I actually touched my elbow to the vulnerable area. Also, I had him demonstrate the wrist-lock on me, so that I'd know what it felt like. For me, it was a bit much. Instead of striking with an elbow to the spinal cord which could disable him permanently or even elbowing to the temple which could have caused a concussion, I mixed in an ouchi- and a kouchi-gari. The trainer fell with ease. He pointed out that the system he taught had its own way of doing the forms. I agreed, but said that it's my goal to be able to throw into submission or hold-downs. At the end of the lesson, he mentioned that I should also have respect for him so I should not take him down; and then he showed me their seminar information sheet. I declined the invitation, because although they are friendly, as he said, the last time I went to an eight hour seminar on BJJ it f-king killed me. I said I didn't wanna talk about it. My Dad was waiting at StarBucks Coffee. Next to him were a white guy playing on the computer and an old black man. Dad got me an apple juice and asked to carry his bag into the car, which I did. He went to the bathroom and then I had to go, too. The next part I am not proud of. I asked him if in the future he would carry his own luggage or give me money for the seminar. He got mad, saying I would only be polite with him for money. He said he didn't let his parents go near heavy loads when we lived in Moscow; and did everything himself. I know he was a dutiful son, but still... Anyway, when I got home, I argued with Mom - I don't even remember what about. Oh wait, she asked me to reach something laying high on the shelf and I refused. My parents mentioned having me move away with Section 8 of the Conservatorship, because my behavior was rude. I told them they were the ones being rude, threatening me over trifles. I didn't want to go, so I hope it's an empty threat.

The next day I went running. Well, more like walking, but I did a little bit of running too. I grew tired. In the afternoon for BJJ class all I'd have is my technique - no speed or power. That's what I told my Dad when he drove me there. Unfortunately, I did not get a chance to roll. Sifu invited me to his office before the class got started. I asked if something happened. He said yes. He asked me whether I know why I was in his office. I said no, I don't. He asked if I was going to be a trouble student in his school. I said no, what do you mean? He said I attacked one of his trainers the day before. I said I didn't attack anybody. He said that I took the trainer down and before that I hammered Sifu over the head with that failed triangle escape, so now it was the second time. I said that I didn't hurt him, all I did was take him down. Sifu said that maybe I should not come to the school anymore. I said I wanted to come to the school, but I also wanted to train with grappling possibilities in mind. Sifu asked whether I asked for the permission of the Trainer to take him down. I said no, but the Trainer wanted me to elbow him in the spinal cord which I wasn't willing to do. Sifu mentioned that I clubbed him with my foot over the head. I conceded that it wasn't the best escape to use, but then he was trying to choke me with the triangle. He said it was not a fight school. He said he was not trying to fight me back there, all he was doing was demonstrating a move. I said I don't like being triangle choked, and he had my arm across so it was starting to choke me. I said there was energy I needed to release and possibilities to be explored. After all what was I supposed to do? Just help me teach the class, he said, holding my hand. I said I'd like that. He then said he needed to talk to my parents, and I told him my Dad was at the Coffee Shop. So after that I had a long and hard talk with my Dad, who tried to explain to me that I had no right to resist during demonstration and that it was these people's school and their rules. I pointed out that I was no beating boy and if I learned anything after nine years of BJJ it's to defend myself and I am not willing to let go of that gift. He said I was wrong and went on to lecture me about the way life works. He said it was an ordinary school, with ordinary trainers and ordinary discipline and I had to adjust to that. I told him that I like and respect the school, else I would not come there, however, it would have to adjust to me, too. He said with an attitude like that he didn't even wanna go talk to Sifu, because there was nothing to talk about. I told him he just had to talk to Sifu. In the end, I waited outside for them to have their talk. When Dad came out, he and Sifu shook hands, and they said my acount was frozen for a month. Sifu was worried I might hurt somebody at the school. All the while I was watching through the window another trainer teach grappling class. I was envious. In the end, Dad and I bought some ice cream, eggs and a pepperoni pizza at Seven-Eleven. That meant that the following morning I got to do my own conditioning without worrying about making it to class with reserves of strength. I also told my voices that I am not psycho, but a rational, self-controlled human being. They seemed to hear that loud and clear.